Down with the Christmas
Dec 11th
I am feeling so much better today. My throat is still sore and my voice is scratchy, but I feel way better. I can tell I am over it. And I am getting in the Holiday spirit. I thought I wouldn’t be this year, since it has been so rough on us Crum’s, but I am feeling it now. I even decorated the blog to show it. How do you like the snow falling? Very Nice!
Tomorrow is the big Christmas party. I just got done making red and green jello shooters, and in the morning I am going to make a Polar Punch. Woo hoo.
G & K’s Halloween Party
Oct 25th
Well, I must say… we had a blast at G & K’s Halloween party tonight! Nadia really let loose more than I have seen her let loose in a while. I’m glad. We met some really cool people from VS and around the area that I am sure we will be friends with for a while.
There was actually one guy who is from the UK who is an account exec for ubisoft who wants my resume. That is awesome. I am glad we went and I think overall, this party was a great way for us to meet friends, reconnect with old buddies, and network in new ways.
There was even a tatooist there who wants to hook me up with some work. Right on. Oh plus a special duo who I want to shout out to. You know who you are. Wooot!
In 1932
Oct 23rd
1. President of the largest steel company?
2. President of the largest gas company?
3. President of the New York Stock Exchange?
4. Greatest wheat speculator?
5. President of the Bank of International Settlement?
6. Great Bear of Wall Street?
These men were considered some of the world’s most successful of their days.
Now, 82 years later, history tells us what ultimately became of them.
The Answers:
1. The president of the largest steel company. Charles Schwab, died a pauper.
2. The president of the largest gas company, Edward Hopson, went insane.
3. The president of the NYSE, Richard Whitney, was released from prison to die at home.
4. The greatest wheat speculator, Arthur Cooger, died abroad, penniless.
5. The president of the Bank of International Settlement, shot himself.
6 The Great Bear of Wall Street, Cosabee Livermore, also took his own life.
However, in that same year, 1923, Gene Sarazen was the winner of the PGA Championship, one of golf’s most illustrious tournaments.
So, what became of him?
He played golf until he was 92, and died in 1999 at the ripe old age of 97! He was financially secure at the time of his death.
The moral here:
Forget work.
Go play golf!
Things that NEVER happen on Star Trek
Sep 29th
1. The Enterprise runs into a mysterious energy field of a type it has encountered several times before.
2. The Enterprise visits a remote outpost of scientists, who are all perfectly all right.
3. Some of the crew visit the holodeck, and it works properly.
4. The crew of the Enterprise discover a totally new lifeform, which later turns out to be a rather well-known old life form wearing a funny hat.
5. The crew of the Enterprise are struck by a mysterious plague, for which the only cure can be found in the well-stocked Enterprise sick-bay.
6. The Captain has to make a difficult decision about a less advanced people which is made a great deal easier by the Starfleet Prime Directive.
7. The Enterprise successfully ferries an alien VIP from one place to another without serious incident.
8. An enigmatic being composed of pure energy attempts to interface to the Enterprise’s computer, only to find out that it has forgotten to bring the right leads.
9. A power surge on the Bridge is rapidly and correctly diagnosed as a faulty capacitor by the highly-trained and competent engineering staff.
10. The Enterprise is captured by a vastly superior alien intelligence which does not put them on trial.
11. The Enterprise is captured by a vastly inferior alien intelligence which they easily pacify by offering it some chocolate.
12. The Enterprise visits an earth-type planet called “Paradise” where everyone is happy all of the time. However, everything is soon revealed to be exactly what it seems.
13. A major Starfleet emergency breaks out near the Enterprise, but fortunately some other ships in the area are able to deal with it to everyone’s satisfaction.
14. The Enterprise is involved in a bizarre time-warp experience which is in some way unconnected with the Late 20th Century.
15. Kirk (or Riker) falls in love with a woman on a planet he visits, and isn’t tragically separated from her at the end of the episode.
16. Counselor Troi states something other than the blindingly obvious.
17. The warp engines start going haywire, but seem to sort themselves out after a while without any intervention from boy genius Wesley Crusher.
18. Spock (or Data) is fired from his high-ranking position for not being able to understand the most basic nuances of one in three sentences that anyone says to him.
ACTUAL EXCUSES FOR SCHOOL ABSENCE
Sep 20th
Courtesy of Ken Crum Jr.
I’ve worked in the main office at a high school for going on 27 years. As you can imagine, I’ve seen plenty of lame excuses for kids being out from school. Here are some of the funny ones I’ve collected:
“Sorry ’bout Britney missing school yesterday. We forgot it was Monday.”
“Please excuse Abner from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday, he fell out of a tree and misplaced his shoulder.”
“Dear School: Please ekscuse Leon for being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.”
“My son is under a doctor’s care today and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.”
“Please excuse Lydia from Jim today. She is administrating.”
“Please excuse Natalie for being absent yesterday. She was in bed all day with gramps.”
“Chima was absent yesterday because she had a hangover.” (I kid you not!)
“Jessie has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.”
“Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.”
“Chaz was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.”
“Please excuse Jermaine Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.”
My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the Marines!”
“Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak.”
“Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had diahre, dyrea, direathe, the shits.”
“Please excuse Jim for being. It was his father’s fault.”
“I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don’t know what size she wear.”
“Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.”
“Sally won’t be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.”
“Please excuse brenda, she has been under a doctor for three days.”
